I’ve been fairly successful in life because I push myself. I don’t have a big house, fancy car, or name brand things, but our modest home and practical vehicles serve us just fine. We life day to day, paycheck to paycheck, but life is good. We have what we need.
Every day I push myself to my limits – as I write this blog I am struggling through sensory overload just trying to get words out.
When I’ve gone too long without refreshing my batteries I sometimes get sensory overload. Many people now understand that sensory overload is something that many Aspies struggle with, but my sensory overload is a bit different.
All of my senses seem to connect to two parts of my body – my head and my stomach. Most of the time when I am worn down I will get a “headache”. Naps or long hot baths are often an excellent cure when all of my characteristic Aspie anxiety ends up in my head. I can (and do) push past a headache for a few hours if I need to get through my work day, although if I go too long I might cry.
Headaches are horrible but when everything shifts to my stomach I am crippled. every sound, smell, or movement, makes me gag. Sometimes all I cam do is like in bed in a quiet room but not today.
Today I am fighting the swirling nausea. I am choking down the urge to vomit. I’ve got work in five minutes and I’ve got a life to get to. My job lets me work from home fairly often, so on days like this – when I wonder how many hours of my life have been spent with my head in a toilet – are my own little secret. Never let them see you sweat.
Toughen up Aspies – the world doesn’t understand us yet, so we have to fight to fit in. I am sick but I am pushing myself as hard as I can.