The other day I commented on one of those “Child Cured by Autism” posts on Facebook. What on earth was I thinking? The sharks appeared.
Disbelievers and angry parents who HATE Autistic aduts with the “high functioning” / Asperger’slabel. These people can not stand to see us grouped in with their children.
Things get ugly fast and I remove myself from the toxicity.
I see them on Facebook and hide them from my news feed. Memes by Autism Moms talking about how difficult being a parent of an Autistic child is. I get it parenting an Autistic child is hard – but so is parenting a typical child.
My biggest issues with these posts that these parents make the children feel like a burden they focus on the problems these parents have and are negative. Why can’t we focus on the positive parts of this child?
Focusing on someone’s deficits and shortcomings and telling them that they are defective or broken is NEVER okay – especially for a developing child.
Telling the world of your child’s “faults” via the internet is cruel.
Eventually, when your child is old enough they may desire to start speaking for themselves. This is a personal choice and should be respected.
When and if the time is right, I hope they DO grow to self advocate – we need more Aspies sharing in this world.
Adults usedto talk for me when I was a child. I believed everything they said about me – that I was stupid, rude, strange.
My parents spoke for me, often inaccurately but I never corrected them. I have never been very good at explaining my inner workings out loud.
Children should never have to grow up feeling like they are not good enough the way they are.
Autism Awareness month happens every year, but we don’t need awareness we need acceptance. We need love and understanding.
Like a flower, when nurtured, Autistic children will grow and bloom. Please don’t pour poison on your flowers.
Autism Warrior Parents (AWPs) insist on supporting their autistic kids either by trying to cure them, or by imposing non-autistic-oriented goals on them—rather than by trying to understand how their kids are wired, and how that wiring affects their life experience. Ironically, an AWP’s choices not only interfere with their own kid’s happiness and security, but contribute to social biases that prevent autistic people of all ages from getting the supports they need. Worst of all, by publicly rejecting their own children’s autism and agency, and by tending to hog the autism spotlight, AWPs are partially responsible for the public’s tendency to sympathize with parents rather than autistic kids —which, at its most extreme, can mean excusing parents and caretakers who murder their autistic charges.
But parents who learn how to spot and sidestep AWP mindsets can make their autistic child’s life (as well as their own) so, so much easier.
Read the full article here.