Autism’s Not So Bad – Why I Focus on The Positive

On this blog I share my difficulties so that others who have similar troubles will know they are not alone.

In life I try to focus more on the positives. It is better for me to focus on the things I can do versus worry over the areas I’m lacking.

I could beat myself up over my flaws until my self-esteem is in the toilet and I slip into a deep darkness. Trust me I’ve been there before and getting down like that is not helpful. Sure, I have limitations and disabilities but we all have troubles and obstacles to overcome.

When I was younger adults pointed out my flaws. Teachers and school highlighted all the ways I was a failure. I felt completely inadequate and was physically ill from anxiety.

My skills and artistic abilities were always discouraged. Nobody pushed me to peruse my talents. People assumed I would grow up and never make anything of myself.

It has taken years to recover from this trauma. The past few years have been the best years of my life – especially since discovering my Autism. The amount of self compassion needed to accept this truth helped me shift my thinking.

My Autism has given me quite a few gifts that I would like to highlight. These are the things I think about during my day. Reflecting on the positives keeps me going, making sure I don’t fall into a pit of self-pity. I have to keep moving.

I am extremely detail oriented (almost to a fault sometimes) but when doing the right types of tasks I am better than most at catching certain things.

My personality – these traits I believe come from my Autism. I am very loyal, honest, and self motivated. Above all things I value the truth.

I am a very dedicated employee and am great at following a list of tasks. I don’t socialize when I should be working and generally try to do work I love. I work hard and follow the rules.

Peer pressure does not get me. I am able to see when others are being illogical. I am a VERY logical person. I can also be calm when others panic (depending on the situation).

I have a bond with animals and nature. A walk in nature cures anything in my soul.

I’m not afraid to go against popular opinions – and will often comment when I disagree with them.

My perspective is different. Autism affects the way I intemperate the world so I have a unique perspective. This can be very helpful in a group when looking for new solutions.

I see music videos when I close my eyes and recall songs in my head like a jukebox. The movies come alive in full color. This is just magical. I also memorize songs and know all the words to just about every song I enjoy.

I can write in a way that comes from my Autistic experience. I’ve read so many books. As a child I read fiction, Stephen King, Dracula, and many more adult books. I remember the beautiful patterns in the words. I’ve read all the classics and now I read non-fiction. These things have rubbed off on me.

Patterns are everywhere and I see them. I see pasterns in everything – people, objects, concepts. Sometimes I get lost in them but I’ve learned to use these things as a guide for my life. It makes things more predictable – which most Aspies can appreciate.

Synesthesia – I enjoy mine but am not ready to put the experience into words. Sometimes it is distracting and even distressing. It made driving very difficult. Until about a year ago I didn’t even know there was a word for my experience. Still – I actually love this part of myself and would NEVER give it up.

So despite the days where I am sharing a painful experience, these are the things in my mind on a day to day basis. I remind myself every day of the ways I am blessed so that I am not overcome by darkness.

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24 thoughts on “Autism’s Not So Bad – Why I Focus on The Positive”

  1. I totally agree with you. I am detail-minded too. That was a handy asset to have back when I was a library cataloger. I don’t believe I’d have a passion for writing if I wasn’t autistic. If there ever was a medical cure for autism in a bottle of pills, I’m not so sure I would take a pill.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Your experiences in trying to remain positive when there is so much negative surrounding you is not unique to autism. It is just more focused. I am glad you are now able to better understand your world and the world of others after your diagnosis. It must be a huge relief. Keep sharing. Your insights are priceless.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Your post is a clear and required demonstration showing that words have power. Teachers and staff need to develop skills for discussing service plans and updates with individuals and their families– they need to develop a level of sensitivity and professionalism to frame their meeting and communication goals with, and schools/agencies must do better. We are more the same than we are different. All that needs to be discussed are your goals, plans, and the ways that each person in your life (professionals and family members) may support you as you strive towards your goals and/or develop new goals. Challenges are part of the conversation, but when discussing challenges, the focus must be on how to support you through your challenges with dignity. Thank you for sharing, and keep writing! I am liking AND sharing!!!!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. ” Hiding in Plain Sight: Shining Light on Women with Asperger/Autism Profiles” is an upcoming conference near Boston on March 3rd. I’ve heard that quite a few autistic women have submitted writing for it, and a few of their submissions will also be read out loud at the conference. You might like some of the writing! (Thinking specifically of this post’s content.)

    The full set of submissions will be available in some sort of online format, though I don’t know the details.

    http://events.r20.constantcontact.com/register/event?oeidk=a07edp0daoqb97682d5&llr=b54cxzaab&showPage=true

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hi Anne,

    Isn’t is true that if we spend time doubting the blessings in our life we won’t get bogged down with the other thIngs we don’t have. You look at the strengths and that is great.

    Thanks for sharing,

    Gary

    On Mon, Feb 20, 2017 at 1:11 AM Anonymously Autistic wrote:

    > anonymouslyautistic posted: “On this blog I share my difficulties so that > others who have similar troubles will know they are not alone. In life I > try to focus more on the positives. It is better for me to focus on the > things I can do versus worry over the areas I’m lacking. I coul” >

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I got a certificate in InDesign yesterday after just two days of training – Monday and Tuesday – and the instructor said that I was ‘The best Student’ he ever had.
    This is all a far cry from the resentful, binge-eating, unmotivated so-and-so who was constantly told at work that I wasn’t ‘up to speed’ and ended up doing remedial tasks until my dismissal.
    As for going against popular opinions, I keep my cards as close to my chest as possible. I argue within reason rather than just rant, whine and insult like those on the internet. 🙂
    I have had zero sleep last night, on a high after the successful day yesterday. Hopefully it doesn’t lead to hypomania. :S

    Liked by 1 person

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