Autistic Confessions – I Just Can’t Do People Today

Sometimes I have days where seeing another human being seems like the most draining and intimidating task in the entire world. These are the days when I just want to stay home and speak to nobody.

There are days when I need to recover from all the excitement and bustle of professional life, sitting in silence barely saying a word outside of typing on my keyboard. Days like this I spend at home – my dog and husband are the only creatures I want to see. Sometimes, as I conserve energy, even these interactions are at a minimal.

Every now and then there are times when I don’t feel like talking. I avoid conversations and crowded places. Please don’t take it personally when I conserve energy.


43 thoughts on “Autistic Confessions – I Just Can’t Do People Today”

  1. It’s just me and the kitties. I have a “Day Sleeper” sign to keep people from knocking. But then… I don’t have friends.
    I highly recommend days without people… just not too many. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I was determined to move out as a child because I was desperate for solitude and the ability to control my own surroundings. Sometimes you feel so out of control. This world is not very autism friendly and it can be overwhelming. Imagine if you had no communication, the frustration that would causes. My own verbal communication is limited at times, especially if I get anxious (which I do a LOT) and that is hard. As a child I had a lot of the same behaviors – all but 2 of them actually. However I was left alone in safe spaces as a child (even if being monitored from another room closely).

      Liked by 1 person

  2. To be honest, I just want to ask if the dog in the header is a greyhound (and as a punishment my greyhound just kicked me in the face).

    I’m glad you can get the alone time you need it. I also need a lot of quiet time alone to recharge my batteries and unwind. Sadly, I can’t explain it well enough to make NT-people understand, which is a problem since I was forced to move in with my mum and her boyfriend a few weeks ago. So I suppose my question is… how did you explain it? I don’t know how much more of this I can take ^^;

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I tell people I need to decompress. I say I’m just really sensitive to literally everything, and it gets to be too much for me to process. I need time by myself without any other stimuli so I can break down and work through everything that I can’t otherwise because new stimulation just adds to the pile of previous stuff. It’s like filling up and overflowing – I have to stop all input and work through what’s already filling my cup before I can accept more.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Thank you so very much for this answer. I think I’ve only told people that I need some quiet time by myself when stimuli becomes too much, but not why (perhaps because I think it’s obvious?). I’ll try something like this. My parents seem to think that a night’s sleep is enough, but this has nothing to do with sleep, of course. :/

        Liked by 2 people

  3. May i ask, since you mentioned in a few posts back that autism may be invisible, what are your thoughts on people who can identify with your posts but don’t feel like it’s fair to call/classify themselves as ‘autistic’? Once again, thank you for sharing how you feel at times, it’s something I’m sure many can relate to feeling. It’s also comforting to know, that we’re not crazy for feeling the way we do too.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Heya!
      Sorry for butting in, but this reminds me of myself a few years back. I stumbled upon an autistic blogger, which led to finding more great blogs. I could really see myself in experiences, thoughts and feelings the bloggers wrote about. But.. I wasn’t autistic, I had looked up the diagnosis criteria for autism and I couldn’t see myself in those criterias (but as I later found out, no one can). Then, a psychologist thought I should get assessed for autism, and oups. There you go.

      I didn’t feel like it was fair of me to call myself autistic either back then, but I can proudly do that today. Of course, I’m not saying you’re autistic, I know nothing about you, but it doesn’t have to be such a far stretch, you know what I mean?

      Liked by 3 people

        1. This is probably very common among women.

          Before I officially received my diagnosis (during my assessment), I already felt at home in the austistic community. It was amusing to watch my psychologist trying to gently break the news, because apparently it’s common to react negatively to getting a diagnosis. Idk.

          I’m still worried about not being autistic enough though.

          Liked by 3 people

          1. I think I found it. Disability & why I feel like a liar, no? It’s such an important topic, that isn’t discussed enough (the medical community has no interest, maybe because they’re often complicit). Disabled people are gaslighted all the time, it’s no wonder we doubt ourselves. :/

            Liked by 3 people

          2. That’s the one. I didn’t mean to send you on a search through my ramblings. The gaslighting is HUGE. Especially when the topic of narcotics meds comes in. My point was you are absolutely, 100%, wonderfully valid just as you are. Never use someone else’s yardstick to measure yourself.😘

            Liked by 3 people

  4. Hi Anne,

    We all have those need my space days. Hope you get peace of mind and heart when you have to get time alone.

    Gary On Wed, Mar 22, 2017 at 1:55 AM Anonymously Autistic wrote:

    > anonymouslyautistic posted: “Sometimes I have days where seeing another > human being seems like the most draining and intimidating task in the > entire world. These are the days when I just want to stay home and speak to > nobody. There are days when I need to recover from all the excite” >

    Liked by 1 person

  5. I was just commenting on someone else blog about needing downtime, that is, removing myself from outside stimulus and the outside world, in order to function in that world. If I don’t allow that time everyday, it becomes more and more difficult to do that.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m not autistic, but many of the features of Asperger’s seem to describe me well. I still understand these feelings. I have had lifelong problems with mental illness that result in me isolating myself. I am lucky to have a job that does require analytical and problem solving skills but with minimal interaction with other people. I only have a couple of friends, and they don’t know about my illness, yet when the call me I frequently cringe at the thought of having to interact with someone and then I feel guilty and ashamed for feeling like that about my only friends. My family is used to it, they understand that sometimes when they call me I don’t answer not because I am busy, but because the noise inside my head is the only thing I can deal with at the moment and there is no cognitive ability left for dealing with people. They understand that text messages and email are frequently the best ways to communicate with me. I seem to be able to handle those even at times when just a few spoken words with another person is too much for me.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. I relate – but also I have Social Anxiety. Phone calls have always given me anxiety but did not know why until I really looked at myself. I get anxious on the phone because I have a verbal communication impairment PLUS people are hard to hear over the phone especially when you have sensory processing disorder. Phone calls confuse me because I miss a lot of details because my brain can’t keep up. Also people tend to talk faster on the phone and don’t like when you pause to think about your words – because they think you hung up but I need time to think before I speak. The entire thing is very stressful.

      Liked by 1 person

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