There’s a difference between being tired and being burned out. Tired is what I feel after a long day of work. Burned out is what I feel after weeks (or even months) of trying to keep up with the relentless demands of a world that doesn’t accommodate people like me.
Burnout isn’t just exhaustion—it’s a complete shutdown of mind and body. It’s losing the ability to function at even the most basic level. And for autistic people, it’s not just a bad week—it’s a recurring reality.
What Burnout Feels Like
For me, burnout creeps in slowly, like a fog. It starts with small things: forgetting appointments, struggling to focus, feeling more irritable than usual. But before I know it, the fog thickens, and I’m stuck.
During burnout, everything feels harder. Getting out of bed is a monumental task. Conversations drain me to the point of tears. Even simple decisions, like what to eat for breakfast, feel overwhelming. It’s like my brain has hit a wall, and no amount of willpower can push through it.
The First Time I Burned Out
I didn’t know what burnout was until I experienced it. I was 22 and working my first full-time job. The office was an open-plan nightmare: constant noise, fluorescent lights, and coworkers who wanted to “chat” about weekend plans every morning.
I pushed through for months, masking my discomfort and pretending everything was fine. But one day, I hit my limit. I woke up and couldn’t get out of bed. My body felt like it weighed a thousand pounds, and my brain refused to engage.
I called in sick, thinking I just needed a day to rest. That “day” turned into a week, and even then, I wasn’t fully recovered. It was only years later, after my autism diagnosis, that I realized I’d been burned out.
Why Autistic Burnout Happens
Burnout happens when the energy required to navigate the world outweighs the energy we have to give.
Here are some common triggers:
- Masking: Constantly pretending to be neurotypical is exhausting.
- Sensory Overload: Bright lights, loud noises, and crowded spaces can wear us down.
- Social Pressure: Trying to keep up with social norms and expectations takes a toll.
- Lack of Downtime: Without enough time to recover, stress accumulates until it becomes unmanageable.
The thing about burnout is that it doesn’t just happen after a big event. It builds over time, like a slow leak in a tire.
How I Manage Burnout
Over the years, I’ve developed strategies to cope with burnout—or at least minimize its impact:
- Schedule Downtime. I block out time each week to recharge. For me, that might mean reading, stimming, or just sitting in a dark, quiet room.
- Set Boundaries. Saying “no” isn’t easy, but it’s necessary. I’ve learned to prioritize my energy and only commit to what feels manageable.
- Create a Sensory-Friendly Space. My home is my sanctuary. I use soft lighting, noise-canceling headphones, and weighted blankets to create a calming environment.
- Listen to My Body. When I start feeling overwhelmed, I take it as a sign to slow down—before burnout takes over completely.
What to Do If You’re Burned Out
If you’re already burned out, the most important thing you can do is rest. Here are some tips:
- Give Yourself Permission to Pause. It’s okay to take a break from work, social obligations, or anything else that feels overwhelming.
- Focus on Basic Needs. Eat, sleep, and hydrate. Burnout makes even these simple things difficult, so be gentle with yourself.
- Seek Support. Talk to someone you trust, whether it’s a friend, family member, or therapist. Sometimes, just being heard can help.
- Lower Your Expectations. It’s okay to do less while you recover. Give yourself grace.
Visual Snapshot
I’m writing this from my bedroom, surrounded by all the things that make me feel safe. The curtains are drawn, blocking out the harsh afternoon light. My weighted blanket is draped over my legs, and my favorite lavender-scented candle flickers on the nightstand.
The room is quiet except for the soft hum of my air purifier. My cat is curled up beside me, her gentle purring a soothing counterpoint to the chaos in my head. It’s a small, imperfect sanctuary, but in this moment, it’s exactly what I need.
FAQ
Q: How can I tell if I’m experiencing autistic burnout?
A: Common signs include extreme exhaustion, difficulty functioning, heightened sensitivity to sensory input, and a loss of interest in activities you usually enjoy.
Q: Can neurotypical people experience burnout?
A: Yes, but autistic burnout is unique in that it often involves sensory and social factors that neurotypical people don’t face.
Q: How long does burnout last?
A: It varies. Some people recover in a few days, while others need weeks—or even months—to fully bounce back.
Final Thoughts
Autistic burnout isn’t just “being tired.” It’s a full-body shutdown caused by trying to survive in a world that doesn’t always accommodate us. But it’s not a failure—it’s a sign that we’ve been pushing too hard for too long.
If you’re experiencing burnout, know this: you’re not weak, and you’re not alone. Take the time you need to rest, recharge, and heal. The world can wait.
