Networking events are, without a doubt, my personal version of hell.
Picture this: A room packed with strangers, the buzz of overlapping conversations, glasses clinking, and fluorescent lights so harsh they might as well be interrogating you. Add in the pressure to make small talk and “sell yourself,” and you’ve got a recipe for sensory and social overload.
Why Networking Feels Impossible
- Sensory Overload:
- The noise, the lights, the smells—it’s like being trapped in a blender set to high.
- The Social Script Nightmare:
- Networking thrives on quick, superficial interactions. For me, that’s like being thrown into a play where I don’t know the lines or the ending.
- Masking to Survive:
- Smiling, nodding, and pretending I’m comfortable drains my energy faster than anything else.
A Memory of Networking Gone Wrong
A few years ago, I attended a corporate mixer because my boss insisted it was “good for my career.” Within minutes, I was overwhelmed. The music was too loud, people kept interrupting each other, and someone’s cologne was so strong it made my eyes water.
I managed to talk to one person before excusing myself to the bathroom, where I spent 20 minutes hiding in a stall, texting a friend about how much I wanted to leave.
How I Navigate Networking Events
- Scout the Venue:
- I always look for quiet corners or outdoor spaces where I can retreat if it gets too overwhelming.
- Set Boundaries:
- I give myself permission to leave after 30 minutes if it’s too much.
- Use Props:
- Holding a drink or a notebook gives me something to do with my hands, which helps me feel less awkward.
- Prepare Scripts:
- I rehearse a few go-to lines for introductions and small talk, like:
- “What brought you here tonight?”
- “Have you been to one of these events before?”
- I rehearse a few go-to lines for introductions and small talk, like:
What I Wish People Knew
- Not Everyone Thrives in Crowds:
- Some of us do our best thinking in quiet, one-on-one settings—not chaotic group events.
- Accommodations Matter:
- Lowering the music or offering a quiet room can make these events more accessible for neurodivergent people.
- Networking Isn’t the Only Way:
- There are plenty of other ways to build connections, like email, social media, or small coffee meetups.
FAQ
Q: Do you still attend networking events?
A: Rarely. If I do, I prioritize my well-being and leave if it becomes too much.
Q: How do you follow up with people you meet?
A: I send a short, friendly email thanking them for the conversation and mentioning something we discussed.
Q: What alternatives do you use for networking?
A: Online groups, LinkedIn, and reaching out to people individually work much better for me.
Final Thoughts
Networking doesn’t have to mean draining your energy or pushing past your limits. By setting boundaries, preparing ahead of time, and advocating for accommodations, it’s possible to make these events a little less overwhelming.
If you’re someone who struggles with networking, know this: you’re not alone, and there’s no one “right” way to build connections.
And if you need me, you’ll find me in the quietest corner of the room—strategizing my escape plan.
