Imagine your brain as a bustling city, each thought and task a car traveling along its streets. Now imagine every traffic light is broken, intersections are gridlocked, and every car is honking at once. That’s executive dysfunction—a chaotic, immobilizing mess.
For me, this isn’t about laziness or procrastination. It’s more like standing at the bottom of a massive hill, knowing I need to climb it but feeling like I’ve forgotten how to move my legs. Over time, I’ve learned to navigate this mental traffic jam—not perfectly, but well enough to survive.
What Is Executive Dysfunction?
Executive dysfunction is a common struggle for autistic people, but it affects others too. At its core, it’s a neurological challenge that impacts planning, organizing, prioritizing, and completing tasks.
What might seem simple to someone else—like calling the dentist or sorting laundry—can feel like scaling Mount Everest without gear.
How Executive Dysfunction Shows Up in My Life
Starting Tasks:
The hardest part is the beginning. Even when I want to do something—write, cook, answer an email—I can’t seem to cross that invisible threshold to start.
Prioritizing:
My brain doesn’t naturally assign importance to tasks. Laundry feels as urgent as filing taxes, which feels as urgent as watering the plants.
Time Management:
Hours vanish when I hyper-focus on one thing, while other important tasks get forgotten. “I’ll just scroll for five minutes” easily turns into two hours.
Overwhelm:
A to-do list with too many items feels like a wall of noise. Instead of tackling one task, I often freeze, paralyzed by the sheer weight of it all.
A Day in My Life With Executive Dysfunction
A few months ago, I had what I called my “perfect storm” day. The morning began with good intentions: I’d make coffee, write a few emails, and finally tackle the stack of bills on my desk.
Instead, I ended up spending three hours rearranging my bookshelf. I pulled every book off the shelf, dusted, alphabetized by author, then re-sorted by color because I didn’t like how it looked. Meanwhile, the pile of unopened mail loomed in the corner like a silent judge.
By the time I realized I’d wasted half the day, I was too overwhelmed to start anything else. I cried, ordered takeout, and promised myself I’d do better tomorrow.
How I Manage Executive Dysfunction
Over the years, I’ve built a toolbox of strategies to help me break through the gridlock.
1. Break Tasks Into Tiny Steps:
“Clean the kitchen” becomes “put dishes in the sink,” “wipe the counters,” and “sweep the floor.” Each step feels manageable on its own.
2. Use Timers:
The Pomodoro Technique is my go-to. I set a timer for 25 minutes, focus on one task, and then reward myself with a five-minute break. Knowing there’s an endpoint keeps me motivated.
3. Prioritize Ruthlessly:
I ask myself, What absolutely needs to get done today? Then I focus only on those tasks, leaving everything else for later.
4. Create Routines:
Daily routines reduce decision fatigue. I know that every morning starts with coffee, journaling, and checking my planner, no matter what.
5. Ask for Help:
Sometimes I need a friend to say, “Hey, you can do this,” or even sit with me while I tackle something daunting. External accountability can work wonders.
Tools and Resources That Help
- Apps:
Trello for organizing tasks, Forest for staying focused, and Google Calendar for reminders. - Timers:
I love the Time Timer, which shows time visually disappearing. - Planners:
The Passion Planner helps me break down big goals into manageable steps. - Supportive Websites:
ADHD Alien’s comics often resonate with my executive dysfunction experiences, even as an autistic person.
What I Wish People Knew About Executive Dysfunction
1. It’s Not Laziness:
I’m not avoiding tasks because I don’t care—I’m avoiding them because my brain is overwhelmed.
2. It’s Exhausting:
The effort it takes to overcome executive dysfunction can feel as draining as the task itself.
3. Support Matters:
Simple things like understanding, patience, or offering to help can make an enormous difference.
A Literary Parallel
In Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland, Alice says, “I give myself very good advice, but I very seldom follow it.” That line lives rent-free in my head. I always know what I should do—it’s the doing that trips me up.
FAQ: Your Questions, Answered
Q: What’s the hardest part of managing executive dysfunction?
A: Getting started. Once I’ve begun, momentum usually helps carry me forward.
Q: How do you stay motivated?
A: I focus on small wins and remind myself that progress—even tiny progress—is still progress.
Q: What if you get stuck?
A: I’ll switch to something smaller or easier, just to build momentum. Sometimes just “resetting” my space with a five-minute tidy helps.
Final Thoughts
Executive dysfunction is messy, frustrating, and often misunderstood. But it doesn’t mean I’m incapable—it just means I need different strategies to get things done.
If you’re struggling with executive dysfunction, know this: You’re not alone, and you’re not broken. Small steps lead to big changes. Keep going—you’ve got this.
Have tips, tricks, or tools that help you manage executive dysfunction? Drop them in the comments—I’m always looking for new ideas!
