Self-care looks different for everyone. For some, it’s bubble baths and scented candles. For me, it’s lying flat on the floor in a dark room, ignoring my phone, and wearing noise-canceling headphones that make me look like I’m about to land a plane.
It’s not Instagram-worthy. It’s not even remotely aesthetic. But it works.
The Reality of Self-Care for Autistic People
- It’s Not Always Pretty:
- Sometimes, self-care is doing absolutely nothing because you’re too overstimulated to function. Other times, it’s pacing around your living room while flapping your hands because your body needs to release the tension.
- It’s About Survival:
- For me, self-care isn’t just a feel-good practice; it’s a way to prevent burnout, manage anxiety, and stay functional in a world that feels overwhelming.
- It’s Tailored to My Needs:
- Traditional self-care advice doesn’t always work for autistic people. We have to find what soothes our minds and bodies, even if it looks unconventional.
A Day in My Self-Care Life
Picture this: I wake up already exhausted because I didn’t sleep well. The sound of the shower feels like a thousand tiny needles on my skin, so I skip it and wash my face instead. Breakfast is the same as always—toast with peanut butter—because I can’t handle decision-making first thing in the morning.
By noon, I’m overstimulated from back-to-back emails and phone calls. I close my laptop, put on my headphones, and spend 15 minutes rocking back and forth in my chair. It looks strange, but it’s the only thing that helps me reset.
In the evening, I take a walk in my neighborhood. No music, no podcasts—just the sound of my footsteps and the wind in the trees. It’s not glamorous, but it’s exactly what I need.
Why Self-Care Looks Different for Me
- I Need Sensory Regulation:
- My nervous system gets overwhelmed easily, so self-care often involves reducing sensory input or finding ways to release built-up energy.
- I’m Managing Burnout:
- Self-care isn’t just about relaxing; it’s about recovering from the constant demands of masking, social interactions, and sensory overload.
- I Don’t Have Unlimited Energy:
- Unlike some people, I can’t power through an endless list of self-care activities. I have to choose the ones that give me the most relief.
My Go-To Self-Care Practices
- Lying on the Floor:
- There’s something grounding about pressing my body flat against a surface. It’s like hitting the reset button on my brain.
- Stimming:
- Whether it’s rocking, tapping my fingers, or playing with a fidget toy, stimming helps me release tension and focus.
- Noise-Canceling Headphones:
- Blocking out the world for a little while is sometimes the best thing I can do for my mental health.
- Single-Tasking:
- Instead of multitasking, I focus on one small, manageable activity—like folding laundry or making tea.
- Comfort Shows:
- Watching a favorite TV show I’ve seen a hundred times helps me relax without any surprises.
What I Wish People Knew About Autistic Self-Care
- It’s Not Optional:
- Self-care isn’t indulgent or selfish—it’s essential for navigating a world that feels overwhelming.
- It’s Not One-Size-Fits-All:
- What works for neurotypical people might not work for autistic people, and that’s okay.
- It Deserves Respect:
- Just because my self-care doesn’t look traditional doesn’t mean it’s any less valid.
A Literary Tie-In
In Walden, Henry David Thoreau wrote, “I went to the woods because I wished to live deliberately.” That’s how self-care feels to me—it’s about deliberately stepping back, finding quiet, and doing what I need to survive.
FAQ
Q: What if someone judges your self-care habits?
A: I remind myself that self-care isn’t about looking good for others; it’s about taking care of myself.
Q: How do you find time for self-care during busy days?
A: I schedule short breaks throughout the day and prioritize small, restorative activities.
Q: What if traditional self-care advice doesn’t work?
A: Experiment until you find what soothes you. There’s no “right” way to practice self-care—it’s all about what works for you.
Final Thoughts
Self-care isn’t about perfection; it’s about survival. It’s about finding those small, simple practices that keep you grounded, no matter how unconventional they might seem.
If your self-care doesn’t look like the curated images on social media, that’s okay. What matters is that it works for you.
And if you need me, you’ll find me here—flat on the floor, eyes closed, finding peace in the quiet.
